When I was a kid( one million years ago) the ‘tooth fairy” left me a quarter under my pillow at night, in exchange for my teeth that had fallen out. My mom explained to me that the tooth fairy recycles the teeth, and your old teeth are the new teeth that babies get. ( umm, fucking gross!)
So, not only is that scary, that babies got MY old teeth, but also that some one much like a repo man snuck into my room at night, and without waking me, left money under my pillow, and snatched my old tooth, for a baby.
So, I’m not a fan of the tooth fairy. At all. My daughter however, cannot wait until a tooth is loose enough to yank out of her mouth, and leave under her pillow. The tooth fairy now leaves kids 10 dollars per tooth. I guess its a supply and demand kind of thing.
So anyway, last night, after talking on the phone briefly, I go back into the living room to play with the kiddos, and i notice Ryder picking up a toy, and walking towards Lily. I thought nothing of it, until he SMASHED HER IN THE FACE WITH IT. Blood was everywhere, and I was furious, and Ryder cried and signed that he was sorry, and Lily ran to the bathroom. I ran after her, assuming that I would be running to a little girl in pain, who was scared and bleeding.
Not the case.
She was standing on the step stool looking in the bathroom mirror, trying to yank her tooth out! And before she noticed me, she said under her breath “guess he’ll have to hit me again”
Turns out, my oldest, and supposedly most cautious child, had bribed her little brother into smashing her in the mouth, to the tune of one packet of frosted animal crackers.
Well, the tooth was loose, and because I’m paranoid, I prefer Lily to not go to bed with a loose tooth if we can get it out before then. I read an article- kids choke on their teeth…its real.
Anyway, we tied a string onto in, and I gave Ryder the privilege of yanking it out of her gums.
And she loved it. Ryder cried though. He’s not a fan of blood. OR being bribed, apparently.
So here’s a couple things I don’t quite understand about the situation itself:
1. Ryder has access to frosted animal crackers all day long. I don’t hide them, or put them up high. They are just animal crackers for god sakes.
2.Lily has no fear. None. So why not just smash herself in the face? For a minute, I thought it was fight club.
3. Money means nothing to her. Ten dollars shouldn’t be motivation to rough up her mouth.
4. Was i like this as a child? If so…sorry mom!
